**Originally written on 11/7/14**
In other words…a never ending Friday
I’ve entered an entirely new realm of laziness which I never imagined possible. I haven’t written a word in almost two weeks and I didn’t even bother to shower this morning…which is significant considering my anal retentive hygiene habits. Last night I made macaroni and cheese and couldn’t be bothered to eat it afterwards. I stared at the noodles bobbing around in the boiling water hoping they would find a way to drain themselves and jump into my stomach using carb-o-licious sorcery. Squeezing and stirring the processed cheese product into a pot and then spooning it into my mouth seemed exhausting. I turned the stove off and dumped the contents down the garbage disposal. I then walked to the refrigerator and retrieved a soda water which still required thumb and index finger teamwork and dexterity…so I didn’t feel entirely useless.
I forced myself to take a lunch break today and absorb the sun. I spent some time at the bookstore reading about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and reflecting on my own cycle of negative thinking lately. After an hour I had to walk back into the dark and dank parking garage and hop on an elevator escorting me back to my kennel. It’ll be dark by the time I leave work and I’ll imagine the solace of my pajamas as I drive home through traffic to an empty house. I’ll look at the people in the cars around me and feel envious of their weekend plans. BUT…wine awaits me! Fortunately I buy the cheap twist off bottles now so I don’t have to spend extra calories removing a cork. And I added several PBS documentaries to my Netflix queue last night so I’ve got hours of useless facts ahead of me.
I need to snap out of this. I need to look harder for the silver linings and stop whining. I need to take a shower and eat real food. I need to sort through the stack of mail I’ve been ignoring for over a week. I need to take my dog for a really long walk through the woods. I need an evening of karaoke with my peeps. I need to shoot some rainbows and unicorns out my backside. I need it to be 5pm instead of 3:38pm. How can 6 years fly by so quickly and 8 hours feel like eternal purgatory?