Things that are better than being at work

 Having colorful twisty straws full of pissed off fire ants shoved in all of your orifices, fois gras style 24 hours of nothing but the Hallmark channel and boxed chardonnay Explosive and violent post-Taco Bell diarrhea followed by several hours of regret Discovering you were adopted and then learning that the seasoned older man you've been dating and having … Continue reading Things that are better than being at work